I believe you!


Hello Survivor, I see you crouching in the cavity of darkness. I hear your sobs and see your tears. I know you are there. AND I believe you! Many years ago, I lived that darkness. I doubted myself. I doubted my memories. I was afraid. I thought I’d be a terrible advocate. I didn’t have…

A Savage Perp Response


Mr. Andy Savage, You and your church appear to need help writing an appropriate sexual assault perpetrator response.  Your infuriating attempt to avoid responsibility perpetuates rape culture and fails at bringing about the healing you claim you want for your victim.  If you are truly sorry for your sins and really want to make a confession to your church, please…

Growl for Alabama


Today is another eve of my sanity. In just a few hours, men and women in Alabama will leave their homes to vote for a new senator. The news and my husband are trying to prepare me for another predicted fall of our Country’s morality under the veil of “religious liberty”. Religious liberty doesn’t mean…

Neighbors 101


Some neighbors are lovable and others are not so huggable.   No one likes the nosey neighbor who is always spreading gossip or criticizing us, our house or children.  The creepy neighbor who seems to always pop out of the bushes is scary.   And no one likes the infuriating neighbor who always lets and leaves their…

#MeToo Reformation


My first husband tried to kill me.  I am here today because a neighbor called the police. I am Lutheran because my first husband was Lutheran. I was raised Catholic. His Lutheran pastor refused to marry us because of the abuse. He advised me to get away before I married my first husband. My Catholic…

Toxic Identity Politics


Identity politics is a popular subject in the news. It also was a hot topic when I went canvassing for Virginia’s November election. Specifically, some said they were tired of identity politics because they could not identify with a group like transgender youth, or women who marched for social justice, equal pay and a professional…

#MeToo A Brave New Culture


A few years ago the trending domestic violence hashtag was #whyIstayed or #whyIleft in defense of domestic violence victims after the media released footage of a NFL wife violently punched yet she stayed in the relationship. What kind of woman stays in an abusive relationship? Brave. It takes courage to stay. It is not easy…

#MeToo


I was twenty.  He invited me to a party.  He did not ask if I wanted to be raped. It should have been safe.  It my brother’s friend’s apartment. But it was not safe. They laughed and someone handed me an open can of beer. I took a few sips. Everything got fuzzy. I now knew…