Hello Survivor,

I see you crouching in the cavity of darkness.
I hear your sobs and see your tears.
I know you are there. AND

I believe you!

Many years ago, I lived that darkness.
I doubted myself.
I doubted my memories.
I was afraid.

I thought I’d be a terrible advocate.
I didn’t have a “clean” survivor story.

Why would anyone believe me?

I wasn’t simply abused,
Or simply molested,
Or simply propositioned,
Or simply harassed,
Or simply beaten.

My life was full of villains
Full of tragedies
And full of victims trying to protect themselves from the evil surrounding us.

No one protected me.
Each abuser groomed me for the next.
I blindly tried to navigate the darkness,
Stumbling into the arms of an almost never-ending line of monsters.

I wondered if I was forgettable,
Invisible
Created to be used and abused (Romans 9:21)

Are all families as messed up as mine?

When I cried, I was told
I was overly dramatic
Too sensitive, or
Making stuff up.

And sometimes I believed them.

My mother was hostile
And defensive.
My mother said I was lucky
Other people had it much worse than I did.

Why would a mother dismiss her child’s cries?
Or write a new narrative?

People have many reasons for dismissing us.

I know there are women with stories worse than mine.
Perhaps my mom’s story is worse than mine
My story doesn’t negate theirs
And theirs doesn’t cancel out mine.
Nor do our stories refute yours.

It’s not a contest
No one wants to enter a contest like that
And no one wants to win.

From the safety of the light,
I see you crouching in the dark.
I hear your sobs.
I see your tears.
I know you are there. AND

I believe you!

RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) 800.656.HOPE (4673)